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I read the words written on the notebook page every day –- sometimes several times a day –- as a meditation. As a novena. As a prayer. It's my most treasured possession. (Well, Isabel is, but I can’t call her a possession, because it would be like saying you own a cat. Cats grace us with their presence. Isabel does, too.)We've been together for just a few months. A few fragmented, Roman-candle-burning-hot months. It hasn't been easy. A stolen kiss here. A silent coupling there. And a repressed acknowledgement that every single time might very well be our last time. We're both moving, filled with wanderlust. And we know we're not heading to the same place.Saudade.That's what I think as I hold the gossamer paper in my hands. I learned that word when I lived in Portugal with another girl. Someone long gone. Someone Isabel can't stop asking about.That word is about a pain so deep it can't be isolated. Or healed. A thirst that can't be slaked. A nostalgic longing for a love who isn't. I also know that she saw that lust in his eyes because her smile seemed almost flirtatious. The tone of her voice was friendly and mellow. Then, it hit me. I had last heard that voice timbre when she talked intimately to Tyler. Dad and Mom spent a lot of time together in friendly conversation during the week after they went to the ball. As I sipped my coffee, she poured a cup for him and put it on the table. He moved around her with his hand on her back and took his seat. I think I was seeing a mating dance just like those on the Discovery Channel.I finished my coffee, stood up, kissed them both, and said, "I'm going to get dressed. Tyler and I have some calls to make." When I winked at her, she actually blushed, although I think Dad was looking at the paper. I walked upstairs in total amazement. Just like teenagers when the parents are out of the house, they were going to mate as soon as Tyler and I left for work. I just knew it.As we drove to our first appointment, I said to him,.
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